


Whiskey

by Streetlamp_Sunset



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alexis Rose Loves Ted Mullens, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Aromantic Jake, Best Friends Jake & Alexis Rose, Blow Jobs, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Headcanon, M/M, Nipple Clamps, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Polyamory, Porn with Feelings, Rimming, Strap-Ons, Threesome - F/M/M, canon compliant if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:20:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27083299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Streetlamp_Sunset/pseuds/Streetlamp_Sunset
Summary: Alexis booped his nose and rolled onto her back. Jake's shop smelt of wood shavings and linseed oil. It swept over her bare skin, the phantom touch of his hands, firm and steady, “I think you’re my best friend.” Alexis didn’t need him to be anything more than he was.“Yeah, I’m pretty sure you’re mine too,” Jake’s eyes crinkled at the corners.Ted, Alexis, and Jake have sex at his woodshop.
Relationships: Alexis Rose & Jake, Theodore "Ted" Mullens/Alexis Rose, Theodore "Ted" Mullens/Alexis Rose/Jake
Comments: 4
Kudos: 30





	Whiskey

**Author's Note:**

> CW: explicit sex between the lines

Jake was a very good friend, easily one of the best she’d ever had. The regular hook ups didn't hurt either.

“I love this for us,” Alexis said. She lay sprawled out next to him on the bed at the edge of his wood shop. Jake shifted, gaze growing serious as he turned to look at her.

“Alexis,” he swallowed. The ghosts of failed throuples and _I don’t date, Lex_ crowded his voice _._

“Mmm, hey,” she leaned forward, shushing him with a brush of their lips, “ _this,_ Jake.” Alexis booped his nose and rolled onto her back. Jake's shop smelt of wood shavings and linseed oil. It swept over her bare skin, the phantom touch of his hands, firm and steady, “I think you’re my best friend.” Alexis didn’t need him to be anything more than he was. 

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure you’re mine too,” Jake’s eyes crinkled at the corners. He curled closer, “I'm hungry, do you want pancakes?”

“Um, yes, Jake, yum.” 

Alexis rinsed off while he cooked, throwing on one of his well loved t-shirts after she got out of the shower. They sat side by side in bed, going over the sketches for his latest commission. Alexis licked sticky sweet syrup from her fingers. Jake genuinely valued her opinion, admired her taste. She’d never had so many people who believed in her.

When Alexis got back together with Ted he dropped a kiss on the crown of her head, “I’m happy for you, Lex.” Jake smirked, “and, hey, if you ever want to bring Ted over for whiskey, I’d be open to that.”

Alexis led Ted through the side door of the wood shop. Moving through the living area, she straightened the colorful throw lain over Jake’s bed and unpacked their bag on the side table. They could’ve done this at Jake’s apartment, but the shop was so intrinsically him. There was a profound sense of comfort in it. Alexis trailed her fingers over the smooth grain. It was a newer piece. She had been curled up on the couch tucked into the corner of his shop while he stained it. 

Ted wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, tucking his face into her neck, “thank you.” 

“For what?” Alexis asked, tipping her head back to lay on his shoulder. He was definitely going to be thanking her later, but they hadn’t even done anything yet.

“For bringing me here,” Ted smiled as he glanced around the room. Alexis followed his gaze: a bundle of dried wildflowers tied with twine was tacked to the wall, one of her dresses hung nestled among Jake’s flannels, a speckled ceramic travel mug sat in the midst of the dishes piled in the sink. Jake didn’t bring many people here; she often found herself working alongside him on quiet afternoons. Neither of them minded when their things grew together. “For sharing this with me.”

“Mmm, of course, Ted,” Alexis said, “Jake was very interested in sharing.” Ted laughed, grinning as she leaned in to kiss him.

* * *

“Alexis, hey,” Jake made his way through the door separating the rest of the shop from the living area. Her pulse thumped with desire at the sight of him. 

He was down to a tight white tank top and jeans, having already toed off his work boots and hung his flannel on the hook just outside the door. Sweat clung to his skin, a smudge of oil on his cheek. 

Ted’s breath caught, he tensed around her. Mmm, yeah, Jake was devastating like this. And he knew it.

Alexis smirked, stepping forward to loop her arms around his neck, “hi, babe.”

Jake leaned down to close the distance between them. His hold was tight on her waist, stubble rough against her mouth as he sunk into their kiss. He smelt like sweat and wood shavings. The desire to lick it away pulsed through her, heady and animalistic. Alexis nipped at his lower lip as she pulled back. 

“Ted,” Jake acknowledged, his hands wandering absentmindedly over her sides, “traffic lights?” Alexis hummed in confirmation, squeezing the curve of his shoulders before turning to Ted.

“Yeah,” Ted said, wide eyed. His breath came out in short pants, glance flickering over the bulge in Jake’s jeans. “Yeah, uh, that works.”

“Oh, babe,” Alexis cooed, “you’re going to be so good for us.” 

Jake licked his lips, slow, dragging his gaze over Ted’s body. Ted swayed, pinned in place as Jake stalked toward him. Ted gasped as Jake wrapped a hand around his throat and hauled him closer. 

“Hey there,” Jake pressed against him, forcing Ted to stretch up into their kiss. Ted whined, hands scrambling for purchase. “What do you want, hm?” Jake wrapped an arm around his waist and ground their hips together. “You’re already so hard, gorgeous thing,” he let Ted curl into his shoulder as he rubbed against his hip, thumb smoothing over the side of his throat. 

Jake met Alexis’ eyes, smirking. Arousal pulsed through her as he murmured, low and dirty, in Ted’s ear. Alexis settled at the foot of his bed, sliding a hand between her thighs. The lace of her panties was nearly soaked through. She nudged the fabric aside, rubbing firm circles over her clit as she watched them together.

Jake tugged Ted’s polo over his head and tossed it into the corner. Ted let out a strangled moan as Jake reached down to cup him through his jeans, “get on your knees, baby.” 

Ted sunk into the plush area rug, leaning forward to rest his face on Jake’s thigh. 

Sex between her and Jake was usually built between growled words and biting nails, tumbling, and pressing, and laughter. Her stomach swooped with equal parts desire and fondness as Jake ran a gentle hand through Ted’s hair. Ted turned to nuzzle the bulge in his jeans.

“Ask for what you want, babe,” Alexis said. She arched into her hand, sliding two fingers inside of herself.

“Please,” Ted begged, a shock of arousal coursed through her at the desperate tone of his voice, “I want my mouth on you. I want to get you off.” He was so needy like this. Alexis loved watching him give himself over to his own pleasure, trusting them to hold him while he unraveled. She rolled her hips, fingers curling into her g-spot, palm rubbing roughly over her clit.

Jake undid his fly, sliding his jeans and boxers to the floor before kicking them away. His cock hung hard and heavy from his hips. Ted lurched toward him, but Jake’s hand tightened in his hair before he could make contact, holding him still. Jake dragged his cock along Ted’s face. A trail of precum smeared over his cheek.

Ted leaned forward, moaning softly at the sharp tug on his scalp.

“Is this what you want?” Jake asked. He slapped his cock against Ted’s mouth.

Ted nodded eagerly, eyes dark with desire.

“Use your words, baby,” Jake slid the head of his cock over Ted’s tongue. A line of drool dripped down his chin, “beg to suck my dick, tell me how much you want it.”

"Please, I want your dick, Jake, please,” Ted melted into the carpet. He tipped back into Jake’s hand as he blinked up at him, “please let me.”

"Go on then, gorgeous thing,” Jake tugged him forward.

"So good, Ted,” Alexis praised as he closed his mouth around the head of Jake’s cock. She bucked up against the friction of her palm, arousal twisting through her as she edged closer to orgasm, “so, so good, babe.” 

Alexis came with a low moan, pleasure pulsing through her as she got off on her own hand. It was nothing compared to the thrill of watching Ted swallow Jake’s cock. She felt his soft little gasps in her bones. Ted carried so much, watching him let it all go was so beautiful.

“Fuck, baby,” Jake groaned, guiding Ted’s motions with the hand wound through his hair. His abs jumped, muscles twitching as he thrust into Ted’s mouth.

Ted moaned around him. He reached down to palm himself through his jeans, movements rough and uncoordinated. 

“That’s enough,” Alexis said. She climbed off the bed, making her way over to them.

Ted whined as Jake pulled him back, his cock slipping free with a wet pop. Alexis knelt down beside him and curled her hand around the nape of his neck. Jake’s fingers twined with her own, fitting over her knuckles, thumb smoothing over the bones of her wrist. 

Ted’s breath came out in short pants, lips red and wet with saliva. His eyes were blown wide with desire, a stormy ring of blue. He shuddered as she drew him in. Their lips met in a clash of tongues and teeth. She licked into Ted’s mouth, devouring his desperate little moans.

“Lex,” Ted breathed. His shoulders tensed, muscles in his arms bunching as he fought the urge to pull her closer. 

“You’re being so good, babe,” she murmured against Ted’s mouth, “You’re going to sit on Jake’s face now, let him open you up for us.” Alexis nipped at his lower lip as she leaned back and stood. 

Jake wrapped an arm around her waist, bending down to press a kiss to her throat, “are you still planning on fucking me, Lex?” He drew his teeth over the shell of her ear, a sharp shock of pleasure.

“Mmm,” Alexis tipped her head back to chase his mouth, “if you want.” Jake let out a growl, low and anticipatory. Alexis kissed him slow and deep, brushing her mouth over the corner of his jaw as she reached out for Ted. 

He nosed the line of her jaw, hands fisting in the fabric of her dress as he folded himself around her. Jake circled them, hands roaming the muscled planes of Ted’s back. Ted moaned softly as Jake dipped his head to mouth at the base of his neck. He sucked a trail of bright red marks into his skin, the pale indent of half moon teeth pressed into the top of his shoulder.

“Jake,” Ted gasped as he arched into the sensation, pressed between their bodies. 

Alexis slid a hand down his chest. She hummed appreciatively, her fingertips dipping over the contour of his abs. Arousal pulsed between her thighs as she felt the hard line of him straining against his jeans, “m’kay, babe, let’s get these off you.” Alexis undid his fly, jeans and boxers dropping to the floor. 

Ted’s breath hitched as his cock was freed. It pressed, hot and heavy, into her hip. 

His hands ran down her sides, fingers curling beneath the hem of her skirt, “you’re so beautiful, Lex.” Her heart thumped uneven in her chest at the reverence in his voice. He slipped her dress over her head and lay it over the back of the couch. 

Jake’s eyes roamed over her bare skin, lingering. She warmed beneath his gaze, anticipation curling through her. Alexis stepped forward; his arms slid around her waist as she leaned in to close the distance between them. Pleasure sparked at scrape of teeth against her lips, the scratch of his stubble. His hands smoothed over her skin with indiscriminate appreciation. Jake poured himself into the kiss. He had always been better at speaking without words.

“Jake,” Alexis said, breathless, “go lay down, babe.”

Ted watched them with a fond understanding in his eyes. She reached out to stroke the stubbled line of his jaw as he held her gaze before turning to lead him to bed.

Jake settled on his back, hand wrapped loosely around his cock as he stroked himself, “come here, baby.” Ted moved to kneel over his chest, facing the foot of the bed.

Alexis trailed her hand from Jake’s ankle to his hip. She passed him the lube, perching on the edge of the bed to slide her vibe through the o-ring of her strap-on. It was one of her more realistic toys, made of a soft black silicone with a firm core. She stroked fondly over it’s curve, before moving to buckle the straps of the harness. Leather wrapped around her hips and between her thighs, snug and supple with use. A jolt of power rushed through her at the feeling. 

Ted made an appreciative noise as he watched Alexis shift everything into place. His eyes went wide, a gasp cutting off the sound as Jake licked over his hole. Jake’s nails raked over his thighs, fingers digging into the meat of his ass while Ted rode his face. Ted moaned, rolling his hips.

Alexis grabbed a pair of nipple clamps and crawled up the mattress to sit in the vee of Jake's legs, “I’m going to open you up now, babe.” She trailed her fingers from the bend of his knee to the crease of his thigh, spreading his legs to expose his hole. Jake let out a muffled groan against Ted’s skin. 

“He’s so good at this, Alexis,” Ted groaned, bracing himself on Jake’s waist.

“Mmhm,” Alexis leaned in to kiss him, “isn’t he?” She ran her hands appreciatively over his chest. Ted arched forward into the sensation as she tweaked a nipple, rough and quick. Alexis picked up one end of the clamps, tightening the small metal wheels to close them. 

“So pretty, Ted,” Alexis said, hooking her finger in the chain that hung between them. She pulled him into a kiss, tugging lightly. 

“Alexis,” Ted groaned as she nipped at his bottom lip. 

Alexis reached down to rub over Jake’s rim. She slid two fingers inside and he pressed back as much as he could into the stretch. Jake’s hands flexed on Ted’s hips as she worked him open, tendons standing out beneath his tanned skin. God, he was gorgeous. 

“All set, babe,” Alexis pulled out and moved to stand at the foot of the bed.

Jake lifted Ted off him and sat up, reaching out to hold Ted’s chin, “are we still okay?”

Ted nodded, “yes, fuck, Jake.”

“Alright, hands and knees, baby," Jake said, shifting to kneel behind him. Alexis ran her hand down Jake’s spine, over the curve of his ass. 

She lubed the strap on with her free hand as he pressed into Ted, “ready?”

“Fuck me, Lex,” Jake said. He bore back on it as she slid in, draping himself over Ted’s back with a moan. She paused when he had taken all of her. He didn’t need long to adjust, rocking between them. 

“Jake,” Ted whined as he developed a rhythm. 

“You’re so fucking open, baby,” Jake groaned, “taking me so well.”

Alexis thrust forward to meet his movements as he fucked himself back onto her dick, “does that feel good, Jake?” The base of it rest over her clit, ridges rubbing against her with the motion. It was one of Jake’s favorites, thick and curved to hit his prostate.

“Yeah,” Jake said, breath hitching, “fuck, harder, Lex.”

“I got you, babe,” Alexis trailed her fingertips down Jake’s sides to hold his hips, thrusting hard enough that Ted cried out. 

His head dropped to hang from his shoulders and Jake reached out to wrap a hand around his throat. “God, yes,” Ted gasped, arms flexing as he clenched the blanket.

Alexis kept up the pace, brutal, grip tight on Jake’s hips. Pleasure sparked through her at the friction on her clit. Jake moaned as she thrust into him, loud, unabashed with desire. The familiar sound of their bodies meeting echoed through the shop. 

“Oh my god,” Alexis came gasping against the back of Jake’s neck. She fucked him through it, rolling her hips to chase the sensation.

“Fuck, Alexis,” Jake growled, “I’m going to come way too quick if you keep that up.”

Alexis nosed the underside of his jaw, “do you want me to stop?”

“Yeah,” Jake tipped his head back to press a kiss to her throat as Alexis pulled out, “you’re so fucking good at that, Lex.” He stepped onto the floor as Alexis undid the straps of her harness and set it on the side table.

“Jake,” Ted whined. Jake pulled him to the edge of the bed by his hips, wrapping an arm around his waist before sliding back into his hole. He jerked Ted’s cock with tight, quick strokes as he thrust. Alexis crawled onto the mattress, settling in front of them. 

“Lex,” Ted looked wrecked, pupils wide. Alexis curled a hand through his hair, dragging him forward by the nape of his neck. Ted moaned into her mouth, too lost into his own desperate hunger to do anything but open for her. She stroked her tongue over his, swallowing the sounds of his pleasure.

Alexis slid her free hand down his chest, hooking her fingers around the chain hanging beneath him, “these need to come off now, Ted.”

Ted gasped as she tugged the clamps away. The warm metal coiled in her hand. He stiffened, hips jerking as the sensation overtook him. 

“Oh,” Jake grunted, stroking him through his orgasm, “fuck, that’s it gorgeous thing.”

Alexis glanced up to meet his eyes, nipping at Ted’s lip as she leaned back. Ted’s chest collapsed to the mattress with the force of his thrusts, arms splayed on either side of him.

“So fucking good,” Jake dropped his head to press a kiss to Ted’s shoulder, “can I finish in you, baby?” 

Ted whined, breath shuddering out of him, “please.” 

Jake thrust into him until he came, mouth pressed to Ted’s shoulder. He closed his eyes, groaning low and uneven. Alexis smoothed her thumb along Jake’s cheek as he lifted his head, drawing it over his bottom lip. 

“Come here, Babe,” she stretched out and reached for them. Jake wrapped his arm around Ted’s chest, hauling him to lay down next to her.

Ted rolled to slide a leg between hers. He settled his head on her chest as she ran her fingers through his hair. Jake slung an arm around Ted’s waist, hand resting on her side. He stayed curled around Ted until he grew restless, fingertips drumming against her ribs. 

Alexis turned to look at him, “Jake, I’m starving, dinner?”

“Pasta?” Jake asked, already sitting up.

“Sounds yummy,” Alexis hummed. She ran her hand down Ted’s spine, “pasta okay?”

“’s good, Lex,” Ted yawned against her throat, “thanks, Jake.”

Jake glanced up with a warm and easy smile, “of course.” He rolled off the bed, bending to kiss her as he passed. 

“Mmm, love you too, babe.”

* * *

Ted left for the Galapagos, left decals in dark, empty windows, left a hollow ache in the pit of her stomach. It was the right choice for both of them, but it still hurt. Alexis curled up beneath the covers of her too-small bed. Her phone buzzed, dim light filling the room.

[text]

Jake: Stevie told me

Jake: I made cookies

Alexis: chocolate chip?

Jake: come over, Lex

Alexis: ‘kay

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is always welcome. Thank you very, very much for reading!!  
> ❤️ Sunset


End file.
